


Telephoning Home

by Kokoyoshii



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: (wilbur gave it to him), Adopted Sibling Relationship, Adoption, Alternate Universe - Foster Family, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Anxiety Attacks, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Dynamics, Foster Care, Found Family, Gen, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, NO SHIPPING!! THIS IS ALL PLATONIC. THAT WOULD BE WEIRDCHAMP, Parent Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Past Child Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Parent Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Protective Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Protective Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Protective TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Protective Wilbur Soot, Sleep Deprivation, Social Anxiety, Technoblade Hears Voices (Video Blogging RPF), Technoblade is Bad at Feelings (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit is Not Okay (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot and Technoblade and TommyInnit are Siblings, Wilbur Soot is Not Okay, but that'll take time, hes a good dad i swear, hes like the best dad he even has a #1 dad mug, hes never okay lets be real, im so sorry, im sorry, im sorry i swear my fic will be soft but we need buildup im sorry, technoblade likes gardening, you won't be able to rip the SBI family dynamic out of my god damned cold dead hands
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-12 01:54:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28627596
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kokoyoshii/pseuds/Kokoyoshii
Summary: Technoblade doesn't understand when the rules changed, or why, and he really doesn't understand Philza Watson- why does this seemingly kind man seem so interested in him, in helping him, why hasn't he just tried starting a fight with him yet?Wilbur never really talked to anyone, so how did this man with a bucket hat and a kind smile know his name? more so, why was he checking up on him, making sure he's okay? On top of that, why was he being so considerate to him and trying his best to help him? Philza Watson confused Wilbur.Tommy, well..."fuck you,  bitch boy!"Tommy jumped out a fucking window.-or; Philza, the big man himself, collects sad kids like pokemon cards and is honestly just trying his best at helping them.
Relationships: Dave | Technoblade & Phil Watson, TommyInnit & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot & Phil Watson, Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson, Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit, its all platonic here bitch, why cant i find that tag wtf
Comments: 140
Kudos: 894





	1. rules

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! i'm Socks and this is my first work within this fandom :]
> 
> I've, quite literally, read every foster family au for SBI on AO3 and i am in dire need of more, so I'm writing my own! if anything i write sounds similar its most likely because I've taken inspiration, I'm sorry!
> 
> also- my posting schedule isn't that great but I'll try post at least once a week!
> 
> IMPORTANT NOTE:   
> this is based ONLY on the ccs characters! so I'm not writing about Technoblade the youtuber I'm writing about Technoblade the Pigling hybrid who keeps being fucking betrayed lmao I thought this might be important to note! also, this goes without saying, if any ccs feel uncomfortable or wish for fanfics no longer to be written about them I will delete this! RESPECT THE CCs !! 
> 
> Any trigger warnings will be mentioned here in the beginning notes! for this chapter:
> 
> \\\TW//  
> \- referenced past child abuse

Phil admits,  
This was more difficult than he thought.  
  


* * *

  
  
“Look! Oi, look at him! He’s hiding, obviously scared” a boy, maybe 11 or 12 cackled. Pointing a finger underneath the slide which prompted another child, again maybe 12- 13 on the off chance, to approach and peer under to which he promptly burst out into laughter  
  
“He’s like a little _pig.”_ The second child laughed, nudging the first “Hey _, oink oink”_ _  
_ _  
_ Phil raised an eyebrow at the antics of the two, was there a stray cat or something under the slide? He contemplated walking over to ask but was quickly drawn away from the idea as a woman in her 30s approached him with a smile that basically spelled out ‘i don’t want to be here but I'm getting paid so I might as well stay’.  
  
“Philza Wattson, correct?”  
  
“Ah- just Phil is fine”  
  
The woman nodded before ushering him towards the entrance of the building, muttering something along the lines of children, paperwork and a lunchbreak.  
  
“Those two over there are already assigned a meeting, Phil. we have some other kids in line though”  
  
“Oh-” Phil turned to the woman, he had been staring over at the two kids laughing at the slide for a few seconds longer than he probably should have. The blonde man stifled a laugh, waving his hands lightly to dismiss her statement  
  
“no, no- sorry, i was just wondering what they were looking at”  
  
She nodded, long brown hair bouncing slightly as she guided him into the Foster Care Center. The floor was wooden and scratchy, scars of kids tripping or dropping things leaving craters in each piece of polished wood while the walls were a pale yellow, littered with photos and drawings. Its sweet, Phil thinks to himself, he isn’t entirely sure when or why he decided that he was going to become a foster father but he did the training and had received a call much earlier than he had expected, saying he was welcome to come in.  
  
“Right this way, Philz- _Phil_ .” The woman smiled as he walked into what was presumably the meeting room. Phil walked in and took a seat at one end of a messy desk, the woman seating her self across from him after closing the door  
  
“So, this is your first time fostering if i’m not wrong”  
  
“Yeah, it is” he brought a hand to the back of his neck as a nervous habit, fiddling with the brim of his green and white bucket hat “hopefully that isn’t an issue?”  
  
“Not at all!” she smiled, clapping her hands before digging into her desk to bring out a stack of files “here are the kids we have at this center, that are all ready to go home to a new family! We normally would assign children who are in most need of care but we only have one at the moment and he’s…”  
  
Phil looked up from the file he was briefly scanning, belonging to a young girl, and raised an eyebrow at her. The woman sighed, it was too early in the morning for her  
  
“He’s, well, a problem child. A special case, per se. Really, i don't think he would be the best choice for such a young and, with no offence, inexperienced man such as yourself,” she quickly moved her gaze to the door as he shot her what he was praying wasn’t a look of offence. He understood, after all, but at the same time this child...has interested him, and he doesn’t even know the kids' name  
  
“Could i see his file?”  
  
The woman brought her gaze back to him and stared back at his blue eyes as if he was insane- still leaning down into her drawers again and pulling out this ‘problem childs’ file, handing it to Phil  
  
“Of course but...Philza, I don't mean to sound inconsiderate but Techno is…”  
  
“Ma’am I’m sorry to interrupt but...its Techno, again” another woman pushed open the door, bowing her head politely at Phil who was too busy scanning through said boys file  
  
“Oh dear” the woman with brown hair sighed “Philza I’m so sorry but could you excuse me for a moment?”  
  
Phil broke his concentration to look up at her, nodding politely  
  
“Oh- uh, yeah of course. Could I just keep reading?”  
  
“Of course!” She smiled warmly, moving a few files to shift in front of him- though his hands held firmly to Technos file “Rebecca here is such a sweetheart and Jamey is our little star basketballer!”  
  
She nudged the files closer to him before slipping out the door, but not fully closing it. Phil was about to return to reading about this boy, Technoblade- what a unique name, but he heard the two women outside speaking a little louder than they may have wanted  
  
“What happened this time, you little beast?”  
  
Silence.  
More silence.  
And then, finally, a huff  
  
“I told you, they were calling me a pig and throwing rocks at me. So i punched Jamey in the arm and kicked Tyler until he cried” a monotone voice answered, sounding rather proud by the end of the answer  
  
“You fucking vermin. Go apologize! You know that's not how you handle the situation and I'm _sure_ you're exaggerating it. Jamey is our little basketball player and Tyler would never do anything of the sort, you’re just upset that they’re being fostered while you have been sent back-”  
  
“Uhm, excuse me?”  
  
Three heads whipped to the door where Phil poked his head out with a small smile  
  
“Philza! I-”  
  
“It’s Phil” he corrected, a little sterner than he would have liked, before turning and smiling at the young boy “is this Techno?”  
  
“Uh-” the brown-haired woman glanced to her coworker before back at Phil and nudged Techno closer, who flinched at the touch “yes! Yes, this is our little Techno. Say hi to Mr Philz- _Phil,_ Techno”  
  
Silence.  
A squeeze on the boy's shoulder and a flinch  
  
“Hi”  
  
“Hello, Techno” Phil crouched down to the boys level “I like your eyes, they’re very cool”  
  
Techno had bright red eyes, Phil learnt from his file and by looking at the kid, and the boy looked away shyly  
  
“Miss, could I talk with you again. I swear I’ll only take a second of your time?”  
  
“Of course” The woman with brown hair smiled, though she was obviously nervous “Rose could you take Techno here to his room?” she nudged Techno to Rose with a little more force than Phil would have deemed necessary. The two stalked away and the brown-haired woman returned to the meeting room but didn’t even get the chance to sit down before-  
  
“I’d like to foster him.”  
  


* * *

  
  
After a lot of paperwork, attempted bribery to reconsider and constant reminders of Techno being a ‘special case’  
  
Phil was finally back at the Foster Care Center, with the brown-haired woman (whose name he learnt to be Mariana) waiting at the bottom of the stairs as Techno thumped down them with a small brown backpack that was fraying at every seam and a red duffle bag that looked like it had seen much better days.  
  
Phil didn’t learn much about Techno from their first meeting, only that he was shy but had a rude tone, as well as it being uniquely monotone for a nine-year-old, his ruby red eyes which he found out was a birth defect, as well as the fact that he was tall for a nine-year-old- with brown hair that was scruffy and weighed down to his shoulders  
  
_His hair is probably a bit longer, it's just messy_ _  
_ _  
_ Phil had thought to himself on their first meeting, and once again now as the young boy was lugging his bags down the stairs  
  
Oh, and one more thing he learnt- this time, from Technos _big_ file, not his appearance nor attitude.  
He was the product of a child fighting ring,  
Since he was two until his parents were arrested in front of him, at the age of 6.  
  
This boy, this _child_ was a born and raised fighter for illegal betting.  
_And it made Phil's blood boil._ _  
_ _  
_ “Aren’t you excited, Techy? You’ll be going to a new home today- and so quickly, Philza really likes you- I’m sure you’ll be very happy” Mariana cheered, Phil had long given up trying to correct her and just listened as she lacked any true excitement for the boy  
  
“It won’t last” he heard Techno mumble,  
“Yes,” he heard Techno say after another rougher than needed nudge from Mariana was gauged to his shoulder.  
  
Phil and Techno made their way to the car, Phil opening the backseat door with a smile and gestured for the brunette boy to enter as he turned to Mariana  
  
“Thank you for all your help, Mariana” Phil smiled as he felt the door being pulled from his gentle grasp and close, Techno already seated behind the driver's seat.  
  
“No problem Philza-” she hesitated “Techno can come back any time, we all know how hard he is to deal with. You read his file, he’s incredibly violent and antisocial. You saw all the reports, so if he gets overwhelming-”  
  
Inside the car, Techno could hear the words. He would never admit it, but they hurt. He didn't _know_ why he was the way he was, he didn’t _know_ why he was moved from house to house, he didn’t _know_ why nobody liked him- so he gave up trying to _know_ , and instead just played the role. The tall, silent boy who growled and would break your arm if you got to close. The nine-year-old demon, the nine-year-old bloody demon.  
  
Kids called him a bloody demon all the time while they threw rocks at him, to make him get up and punch them.  
Why did they keep asking to get punched only to run away and cry?  
It never used to be like that, people would throw things at him so he would punch them and then they’d punch back. A fight.  
When did the rules change?  
  
_  
_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woohoo! i finished that all in a day! 
> 
> i have a lot planned, so hopefully, i finish this story! if you have any criticism or requests, please send through some comments! i read each and every single one, and i love receiving constructive criticism!
> 
> while you're here, follow my other accounts? I'm on twitter and wattpad as kokoyoshii !
> 
> have a wonderful day :]


	2. locks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil doesn't really know what he's doing and Techno is really confused, you know, the usual

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \\\TWs//  
> \- referenced past child abuse/trauma
> 
> holy shit the amount of support I got from the last chapter was amazing! thank you guys so much!! I'm gonna try upload around this time every Friday (I'm AEST if that helps)
> 
> also, I'm very tired so i didn't beta read this at all so im SORRY f there's any mistakes, please if there's any leave a comment to tell me or give me some criticism, I love receiving constructive criticism on my writing :]
> 
> enjoy !

Phil knows he acted irrationally.

really, fostering the most troublesome child in the foster centre while being ridiculously inexperienced? fuck, that wasn't the smartest idea.

but how could he have done anything else?

His eyes shot up to the rear-view mirror, taking a quick look at Techno who was staring out the window with an agitated look crossing over his features. snarling at the moving houses as if he knew each one,

_and hated them._

Phil focused back on driving. Technically, he wasn't supposed to drive Techno home.

Technically, a social care worker should have driven Techno to his house for a friendly meeting- to not scare the poor kid.

_Technically,_ he should have thought this whole ordeal out better.

The blonde took notice of how close they were now to the house- to their _home._ How would he make this place feel like a home for Techno? could he even do it?

"We're almost there" he started, noticing the slight flinch from the young boy "I set up one of the rooms for you. you can just relax in there if you want, you don't have to come out until you're comfortable but I'll be making dinner, anything you like in particular?"

silence.

_silence._

and then finally, a shrug and a sound of acknowledgement.

He'd have to get used to that, huh?

* * *

  
Two Weeks Prior; After First Meeting Techno

  
Phil crashed against the back of his door, sliding down and crouching onto the floor the second he got home from the Foster Care Center. What had he gotten himself into? Yes, he wanted to be a foster father and yes, he was very inexperienced but as soon as he saw Techno something just _clicked._ His brain was hammering with words he never felt attachments to; “my son”. Some weird bubbly feeling clawed up his gut and was beating him up from the inside because he just got so attached by barely even _looking_ at the kid- much less _talking_ with him.  
  
The man threaded his hands shakily through sandy locks as he stood up, chucking his bag down by the door and heading towards the kitchen for a coffee, he also needed to clean up the house a bit...it wasn’t messy but he certainly didn't want it to be a first impression to the social worker who’d come to do an extra check nor, and mostly directed to, Techno- he wanted the boy to feel safe and at home, but he realised that would take time.  
  
_A lot of time._ _  
_ _  
_ That night, Phil stayed up reading through Technos file, yet again, in hopes of finding out what the boy liked but all that was in that bloody file was incident report after incident report after (and you’ll _never_ guess this) incident report! That's all that was there!  
  
_3rd of August_ _  
_ _Techno hit Charlie because he was angry_ _  
_ _  
_ _17th of April_ _  
_ _Techno broke a whole set of plates because he was throwing a tantrum_ _  
_ _  
_ _2nd of June_ _  
_ _Techno refused to speak and just tried hitting us when we got close to him_ _  
_ _  
_ _9th of October_ _  
_ _Techno bit our youngest chi-_ _  
_ _  
_ Phil frowned as he read through the report titles. Yeah, they were concerning but nothing seemed to be in character for Techno. Granted, he’d only met the boy yesterday so he didn’t know a lot- close to nothing, really, about him but _still._ Closing the file and glancing at the clock, he realised that it was about 6 am and he hadn’t gotten any sleep, and he didn’t think he’d be getting any either at this rate. Groaning inwardly to himself, Phil decided to just get up and get going, he had a lot to do while he sorted through all the legalities of fostering Techno- it was estimated to take about a week and a half, so in that time he had to decorate or, more so, fill the spare room in his house for the young boy when he arrives.  
  
Good thing he knows absolutely _nothing_ about the boy! Thank you, useless file which seems to be used solely for villainizing a child!!  
  
And that's how Philza Watson, the soon to be the foster father of an ex-child fighter, ended up at the cash register with a trolley filled with things that he thought that the young brunette would like. He bought a red doona for his bed as well as a few various items to litter his desk such as pens, books, paper and whatever the lady helping him recommended. So far, so good- right? He had a few basics for Techno, aside from clothes after deciding they could go together so the young boy got to choose his own sense of style, but Phil's eye caught something before he checked out-  
  
A soft, pink, pig plushie.  
  
Maybe about 1ft tall? So it wasn’t necessarily small, but not big either. Asking the man scanning his items to hold on for a minute, the blonde jogged over to the display table to pick up the last one sitting there- and _god,_ was it _soft._ Fluffy pastel pink material with a soft fuzz filled core and Phil couldn’t resist the thought of Techno even _considering_ to like it. Again, he knew close to nothing about the kid, but what young child doesn’t like plush toys?  
  
When he walked out of the store that day, he had two bags and a 1ft tall pig plushie tucked safely under his arms as well as a small, victorious smile- feeling accomplished but mostly excited for the future.  
  


* * *

  
  
“And this-” Phil pushed the door open to reveal a lightly filled room “this your room”  
  
The young brunette peered in, a scowl still prominent on his face as he clutched the straps of his brown backpack, nodding silently- still refusing to make eye contact with Phil  
  
“I wasn’t really sure what you liked so I was thinking we could go clothes shopping tomorrow- or another day! I’m sure you might want to rest up, right?" Phil tried, the room was- well, it wasn’t the best, he’ll be the first to admit he’s no interior designer. A single bed with a freshly washed and dried red doona (probably still warm seeing as he took it out of the drier only about 30 minutes ago before he left to pick up Techno) that was pushed up to the top left corner of the room, a dark oak bookshelf sprawling across the right wall with a few new books and a matching oak desk pushed against the right side of the door. He had scattered a few pot plants across the windowsill on the back wall as well as putting a white bean bag underneath. It was a little messy, but everything was brand new- speaking of;  
  
“I have a present for you” Phil started and waited for Technos response, a short nod “now, again, I don't know much about you but I thought this little guy was pretty cute. You can always throw him away if you don't like him, but, here;” Phil reached under the dark oak desk, pulling out the pink pig plushie before crouching down in front of the brunette and handing it to Techno, who took it after a moment of hesitation  
  
“I know it might not be your thing but hey! Maybe he can be a friend?” Phil offered a small smile before quickly scrambling up- like he just remembered something, which he did “right! Dinner! it's getting late- I can make some pizza, I have some in the freezer! Are you okay with that?”  
  
Silence, Techno was staring at the plush toy in his hands before looking up at Phil with a confused look  
  
“This...is for me?”  
  
Phil seemed taken aback by the question but nodded quickly with a smile  
  
“Yeah! All yours, and so if everything in your room. Oh- I also installed a lock for you, i saw on your report that sometimes you stop talking with people and want to be alone, so you can use this lock whenever you want. I have a key but I won't use it unless there's, like, a house fire or an alien invasion.” Phil chuckled as he showed the lock on the inside of the door “is that alright?”  
  
Techno nodded, no hesitation this time.  
  
“Nice, nice” Phil nodded “I’m gonna start making dinner, you can hang out in here or come downstairs. I can call you when dinner’s ready, I don't mind if you wanna eat up here or something either- so I’ll see you in a bit, how about you think up a name for this little fella?”  
  
Techno stood still, holding the plushie rather gently, avoiding Phil's soft gaze. there was an awkward silence before Phild decided to turn and head downstairs to start making dinner.  
  
(he heard the door to Technos room lock as he trudged down the stairs)  
  


* * *

Techno quickly locked the door as soon as Phil went downstairs, his eyes quickly scanning the room closer. The young boy scrambled around the room, peering through the few shelves, drawers and containers neatly packed away- searching for things. cameras, weapons- anything! and yet, he found...nothing. nothing dangerous or invasive, just a few books (mostly children's storybooks but there were a few bigger, trickier to read looking books), a few collections of pens and pencils, and that toy in his hands.  
  
the one he still hasn't let go of.  
  
why hasn't he let go of it?  
  
Technos nose scrunched in confusion as he moved the plushie further from his face- he found it hard to see things when they were too close to his eyes- and just, well, _looked_ at the thing. no other family had given him anything to call his own. maybe a knife or a pair of scissors, or another dangerous object, but no one has ever given him something like this...something so delicate, so childlike, so...soft. it was so soft, Techno could help himself from petting its dumb-looking head and relishing in the comforting texture as he moved to slump onto the beanbag under the windowsill.   
  
_This is weird,_ Techno decided as he pet the toy softly, _This is very weird._ He had been here for about 15 minutes and it already felt weird, as if something was wrong and he just couldn't put his finger on it. He's been to quite a few different homes, his files tell you all about that, but Philzas was different. The man hadn't forced him to look at him, to talk to or with him, he hadn't slung his arms around the boy or told him when the next match was- Phil just smiled at him, gave him things- gave him a _room,_ and asked what _he_ wanted. surely this was just some sadistic way of getting Techno ready for a fight, right? the blonde man was gonna be nice with him, get him to warm up and then chuck him into another arena- slashing him when he lost or yelling at him to try harder, then he'll inevitably throw him back to the centre with Mariana, prepping him for the next group of people.   
  
"stupid"  
  
Techno mumbled angrily to himself and threw the plush toy to the far end of the room under the desk, watching as its dumb little head smacked against the wall and bounced back to the floor. Techno pulled his knees up to his chest, burying his face in his knees, feeling the scruffy fabric of his worn-out jeans scratched his skin. Shaking his head softly he muttered the word 'stupid' to himself for what seemed like hours until he heard a soft knock at the- his? no. no, _the_ door. he wasn't going to get comfortable here, after all, this was all just plot to get him back into a ring, fighting off people to keep his fingers- right? of course he's right.  
  
"Techno?" Phil's voice was slightly muffled thanks to the door "I made dinner, well I didn't _do_ much because of its just oven-baked pizza, but do you wanna eat up here or do you wanna come down? your choice"  
  
silence.  
silence.  
and once again, more silence.  
  
"tech- oh" Phil stopped talking as Techno opened the door, looking down before nodding and pointing to the room- his black hoodie sleeve falling over his fingers, making the boy push it back up to his elbows, the hoodie was much too big for him.  
  
"you...wanna eat in here?"   
  
a nod. Techno was bracing himself to be slapped across the face, yelled at for not speaking or for wanting to eat away from Phil. but instead, a warm laugh echoed from the man in front of him and a wooden board with a whole pizza already sliced was passed to him  
  
"I wasn't sure what flavour you liked but this is just a plain margarita, you want me to grab you any toppings? I think I have some bacon, ham, olives- pineapple too if you're into eating that!" Phil grinned as he listened off ingredients he could add, taking the tips of his fingers with every option he thought of  
  
"i..." Techno scrunched his mouth shut, taking the wooden board from Phil and stepping back into the room though Phil stayed still a step outside the doorway "I don't eat meat"  
  
"oh- vegetarian? okay! is it okay if I still eat meat or do you want me to get rid of it, I don't mind"  
  
" 's fine" Techno mumbled before turning back into the room, closing and locking the door in Phil's face and moving to sit back on his- _the_ beanbag. Techno knew it was rude to shut the door like that, and will probably get yelled at later, but he was so _tired_ that he didn't care- what he didn't see, however, was the huge smile plastered on Phils face at the fact that Techno actually _spoke_ to him and _responded_ to a question!  
  
So, that night, the first night of Technos stay at the Watson household-they ate separated. Techno, with his knees up to his chest on the white beanbag under the windowsill. The only light floating in through the blinds and flooding his room in a white glow, echoing a sense of unfamiliar familiarity as he watched the stupid pig plush glow in the dark softly as he ate his slices of pizza steadily and refusing to sleep all night, opting instead to read some books on the oak shelves- finding a couple he assumes Phil left by accident about poetry, which is found oddly interesting. Phil, on the other hand, sat downstairs at the kitchen table grinning as he ate his own pizza, scrolling through Twitter before heading to the couch to watch some TV. He stayed up all night, both from the excitement of Techno being in his house and speaking a whole sentence to him AND answering a question as well as the anxiety of scaring Techno by making to much noise walking up the stairs or the poor kid coming downstairs and being alone, in the dark, in a house he doesn't know well enough. He didn't come downstairs, but Phil stayed stationed on the couch just in case.  
  
just in case he could help, with anything at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello again! chapter notes are very confusing lmao but I'm getting the hang of 'em!
> 
> how are you all? hopefully you liked this chapter, I just realized that I never stated Phil's age! He's not an old man just yet, He's 22! I ill mention ages at the end of chapters just in case anyone needs to know!
> 
> Phil: 22  
> Techno: 9
> 
> while youre here, why not follow me on other platforms? I'm kokoyoshii on twitter & watt pad !
> 
> have a great day :]
> 
> p.s: sorry for like the triple upload of this chapter, my notes were playing up!


	3. pancakes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Techno and Phil go shopping :]  
> and then techno be like; shaking 'n' crying rn
> 
> im sorry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> //TW\\\  
> \- uhhhh social anxiety (no attacks. just, like, a mention)  
> \- panic attack (?)
> 
> note: I am not diagnosed with anything but I am getting therapy and tested (is that the right word?) for a few things as per recommendation. So when I write anxiety/panic attacks, dissociation, extreme paranoia or depressive episodes I'll be writing through personal experience. ADHD, *social* anxiety, and PTSD episodes will be, if I write them, based off stories I've read, heard from diagnosed friends or from my own research. any tips would be greatly appreciated!

  
“Techno?”  
  
Phil's voices rang from behind the boy's door, it’s been two weeks and yet he still flinches each time. Quickly standing up from the white beanbag beneath the windowsill, which he’d taken quite the liking to, he padded over to the door and opened it only enough for his eye to peek out and analyse Phil; calm, no hint of danger.  
  
“Hey mate, listen” Phil brought a hand up behind his head to fiddle with the brim of his bucket hat out of nervous habit- he wore the stupid thing everywhere, Techno had learnt rather quickly. The young boy couldn't help but feel an awkward twist of fear bubble up in his gut  
  
_He’s going to kick you out_ _  
_ _  
_ _Nah he’s gonna show you a new fighting ring_ _  
_ _  
_ _Blood! Blood! Blood!_ _  
_ _  
_ Voices in his head whispered, piercing his ears before he shook his head roughly- focusing his attention back to the older man in front of him, who had waited patiently for Technos attention, smiling once he noticed Techno nod- the two still have yet to make eye contact.  
  
“I was wondering, only if you’re up for it, if you wanted to go out shopping?” the man offered an unsure smile at Technos tensing shoulders “you’re going to need to head to school in a couple of weeks and I’ve only seen you wear two or three sets of clothing- which don’t fit you that well, buddy, so…”  
  
The brunette shuffled on his feet uncomfortably, his grip on the door hardening to show his knuckles turn white. Outside? into the public? He’s been once or twice with another family, each time he...didn’t handle it well. Voices echoing through his head as he could barely resist the urge to bodyslam strangers walking by to show them that _he was stronger._ _  
_ _  
_ _That he could win._ _  
_ _  
_ It wasn’t a good idea. It really wasn’t, and Phil picked up on his nervousness thanks to his silence, kneeling in front of the young boy- showing his hands with his palms displayed up; a motion he had learnt Techno appreciated a few nights ago when he startled the poor boy during one of their separated dinners. Techno had come downstairs to fill up his water bottle (he never used glasses, opting to fill his own water bottle he brought and only drink from that) and Phil hadn't heard him come down, so while Techno was refilling his bottle at the sink in silence, Phil had thrown something away causing a loud crash. Techno had whipped his head around at a speed Phil could barely comprehend as the 9year old jumped up onto the counter ready to jump out at Phil. The blonde, who had no idea what had happened, simply raised his hands in surrender and gently called Techno, asking him to relax. So, from that experience, Phil had learnt showing his hands calmed Techno slightly- which only made the man's blood boil at the thought of what the poor child- this poor child who is his _son_ no matter what legalities have to say for now- had to go through.  
  
“Hey, you don’t have to if-”  
  
“Okay.”  
  
Even Techno was stunned by his answer, tensing his jaw before fleeing back into the room and closing the door. Letting out a soft huff of air, he pressed his face against the old oak door  
  
“When?”  
  
There was a heartbeat of silence before he heard Phil's clothes rustle, indicating he was now standing- a smile evident in his voice  
  
“I was thinking tomorrow because I have the day off, but can we go another day after I finish work?”  
  
Phil had been staying home almost every day, sitting in his office downstairs typing who knows what on his computer the majority of the time. On the occasion he’d knock on Technos door and tell him he had to go out for a bit, asking if he wanted to tag along or needed anything- he’d always answer a muffled ‘no’. So either way, it didn’t matter to Phil when Techno wanted to go- because he could, and will, make time for the boy.  
  
“Tomorrow”  
  
Was the muffled response he got, sounding mildly unsure  
  
“Tomorrow”  
  
Was Phil's confirmation before he turned to walk back downstairs with a smile- he definitely counted this as progress!

* * *

  
  
So, it was ‘tomorrow’ and Techno might be regretting his decision.  
  
He had stepped out of Phil's car to see the massive shopping centre looming overhead. Any other, _normal,_ child would be overjoyed- his brain had scolded, but there he stood; practically terrified. What was inside? Was it safe? No, no, of course it wasn’t safe. Technos brain flew into analytics, decoding how he’d get out, how he’d escape the second something went wrong; where he’d go, what he’d do- and most importantly,  
  
“Are you alright?”  
  
Phil.  
  
Techno looked up slightly, still not enough to meet the blonde's eyes- only to about his mid-chest, and furrowed his brows. If something were to go wrong, what would Phil do? Would he help, or let it happen? Was this even a shopping centre? What was the strange man plotting, surely this isn't some innocent shopping trip, there just has to be a twist.  
  
_Bodyslam him._ _  
_ _  
_ _Send him flying._ _  
_ _  
_ Techno shook his head to shake the voices away, successfully numbing them before taking a step back from Phil.  
  
“ ‘m fine”  
  
“Alright...” he sang the word out softly, sounding entirely unconvinced “let’s go get a shopping trolley and start with clothes, how does that sound?”

  
  
It sounded fine, 

yet ended up being humiliating.  
  
  
Phil had taken a trolley from the line and headed into a clothing store bigger than Techno had ever seen. The young boy stayed by Phil, edging closer than he liked to the older man whenever a stranger walked past or a toddler cried nearby and by the time they ended up in the aisle with his sizes, Techno was slotted in between Phil and the trolley, his eyes just peeking over the handlebar between Phil's hands. He shuffled along awkwardly as Phil walked and _sure_ he still felt very uncomfortable, but he could probably take Phil on if something went wrong? And _at least_ he knew a little bit about him. That was obviously a better situation then trying to tackle down a stranger, right?  
  
Phil was average height, so he was taller than Techno but not by too much, and he always wore baggy clothes; the black robe he usually wore concealed his arms but the brunette reckons he couldn’t be that strong. In a fight, Techno would win.  
  
His breathing picked up.  
  
_A target_ _  
_ _  
_ _A threat_ _  
_ _  
_ _A-_ _  
_ _  
_ Techno shook his head roughly for the second time today, trying to relax his breathing and catching Phils attention who just hummed softly  
  
“You alright there, mate? We’re at your aisle”  
  
Flinching slightly, Techno slipped out of the space between the trolley and Phil. His gaze falling to his feet as he nodded. This was going to be a long day.  
  


They ended up shopping longer than expected. 

  
By the time they finished, it was already 2 pm, but Phil thinks it was a good day- progress was made, in his opinion. It took a lot of coaxing but he did end up getting Techno to choose his own clothes, and he was surprised at the boy's eye for fashion. It was..very unique- but he’s not complaining! Picking out about three or four new sets of clothes and two pairs of shoes was all he got Techno to choose, which was fine, but he couldn’t help notice how on _edge_ the boy had been- and how he kept checking the price tags during the day.  
  
  
“Techno?” Phil called, crouching next to the boy who seemed to be zoning out while looking at a rack of shirts- long-sleeved with slightly frilly cuffs, looked almost like a costume for a royal character. Most of the items he had been looking at had a certain...regal aesthetic to them, colours blending with whites, golds, reds and black. Techno must have noticed his presence because he jumped back, staring at Phil with full-blown eyes, those ruby red eyes finally looking back at Phil directly.  
  
“Hey mate, it’s just me”  
  
And just like that, the eye contact was broken. Technos gaze falling onto the tile in front of him and his stance falling to a more relaxed position, though still looking tense.  
  
“Are you alright?” Phil remembers seeing on Technos file that he didn't handle social places well, being taken out a couple of times by previous families who stated a report about how he was aggressive or even violent. Phil just thought he looked scared...maybe a little aggressive too, judging by how he was about to throw a punch, but mostly scared.  
  


“ ‘m fine” the boy muttered  
  
Phil pursed his lips, he wanted to say something but really didn’t want Techno to freak out. One; because he wouldn’t know how to react and two; because it’ll stress the young boy out further. Instead, he opted for nodding silently and holding out his right hand further  
  
“We don’t have to be here much longer, let’s finish picking out some clothes for you and head off to get lunch. I think there's a good pancake place around here?” he started standing up, still holding his hand out in case Techno chose to grab it- and much to Phil's- and Technos, honestly- surprise, he did. “Do ya reckon pancakes for lunch is weird?”  
  
Technos hand tensed a little but relaxed as he shook his head softly  
  
“Uhm, I’ve never had them before” he quietly muttered “so I don’t...know”  
  
“Well now,” Phil grinned, sending a soft reassuring squeeze to Technos hand “let’s change that, shall we?”  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Techno glared at the soft plushie still thrown carelessly under the desk, he hadn’t touched it since that first day- yet he craved to. Why? Well, because of how soft it was. It had calmed Technos nerves, he realized, which is why he panicked and threw it- deciding to never touch it again, never give himself the guilty pleasure of feeling calm again.  
  
After all, this entire situation was only temporary.  
  
Phil was nice, sure. But it was an act, obviously. Techno chided with a nod, it’s just some act that Phil is putting on- being so _nice._ Techno almost punched his lights out today and he bought him pancakes afterwards  
  
_Probably a way to ease pawning you off_ _  
_ _  
_ _Yeah, maybe he poisoned your food_ _  
_ _  
_ Techno didn’t shake his head, didn’t try to numb the voices as they bled through his ears- giving him a splitting headache, honestly. He just sat there, on his white bean bag as rays of fading day flooded the room, staring absentmindedly at the damn, stupid plushie. His head was crying out in pain but he refused to give a reaction, the voices increasing in volume and numbers- each different and unique, but all requesting the same type of thing.  
  
_Violence._ _  
_ _  
_ It hurts. It hurts so bad. But he’d dealt with this for as long as he can remember, so it’s fine. He threw his body back, head slamming against the wall behind him- vibrations fluttering up the wall to the potted plants, causing them to shake lightly- he groaned as the pain surged, a few tears filtering down his cheeks as he brought shaky hands to his knotted brown hair, tugging violently to try and override the inner pain in his head as he screwed his eyes shut. Yet to no avail, if anything, it made it worse.  
  
“Please…” he barely whimpered, more tears falling “please...please just stop”  
  
Painful static bounced through his head as voices chanted, gaining volume each second. Everything was too loud, too harsh to...overwhelming. The pain became physical now, a bolt of sharp pain shot from the bottom of his right ear to his temple, making him bring a hand up and hiss from the pressure. he hated this, he really did. Especially when he felt his hearing pick up, every creak from the floorboards downstairs sending his mind haywire, tears falling down his face like a broken dam as he tried desperately to keep his eyes shut, he couldn't handle any light right now. He wanted something to aid him, to calm him down.  
  
Techno felt shame crawl through his system as the voices taunted his desires for comfort. Really, he'd never needed it before- but now that he had the option? the option of that soft dumb-looking pig toy, the option of the soft doona which was always warm as if it was fresh out of the drier before resided to his room at night, the option of the poetry books on the bookshelves, the option of a lock on his door.  
  
The option of Phil.  
and his stupid, stupid sadistic obviously manipulative kindness?  
  
He choked back a sob as his eyes hesitantly fluttered open, the minimal evening light even being too much causing him to flinch, and his gaze fell back to the damn plushie. He got up slowly, feeling like toppling over from the surging pain in his head as he clutched at his hair painfully, wobbling over to the desk and falling to his knees as he reached out to the damn toy, his hand falling limp as he touched its gentle fabric. God, he was so stupid. His mind cursed him and the voices grew louder, but all Techno could do was pull the toy close to his chest and wrap his arms around it- he felt so, so small.  
  
“ _stupid_ .”  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello again!!
> 
> hopefully, you all enjoyed this chapter :]] and I hope you cried or at least felt a pang in your heart :]]  
> I promise my story will be soft and fluffy but there will be quite a bit of angst; luckily for you though- the next chapter will be pretty cute! of course, I'll sprinkle in angst but it will mostly be cute! so look forward to that!
> 
> I love reading critique comments on my works, so if you have any tips/issues with my work- please let me know!
> 
> Notes:
> 
> my other socials: kokoyoshii on Twitter & wattpad
> 
> my upload schedule: every Friday around 10/11pm AEST
> 
> Ages at the moment:  
> Phil: 22  
> Techno: 9 (has stayed with Phil for 2 weeks now)


	4. knocking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Techno goes to school & Phil is worried

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \\\TW//  
> \- going non-verbal (written through personal experiences)
> 
> i promised you guys fluff but turns out angst was supposed to fill this chapter, so i tried giving you guys a break ;]  
> sorry for the late upload! I'll be posting a couple of extra chapters within the next few days as an apology !! see you soon, hope you enjoy!

Standing in front of the full-body mirror that latched onto the wall next to the front of the door, Techno grimaced. 

He was going to school.

The thought had finally settled. He had been to school before, sure, but it always made him anxious. the new people, new place, smells, sounds, everything about it was overstimulating and it really never helped when the voices mocked him during the day.

Sighing, Techno ruffled his hair snarling when his fingers got caught in his still very messy locks. He chose to wear the white dress shirt with ruffled wrists and collar, black dress pants and the pair of black tap shoes. 

Why did Phil buy him all this if it was all temporary?

Techno's eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he tapped his shoe, maybe Phil was just pretending to be middle class, maybe he actually had a mansion and he just brought people here to play off a "I'm a good citizen who fosters troubled kids!" look. That made the most sense, right? 

"Looking good, dude" Phil's voice suddenly called from nearby, the man was walking down the stairs with a smile

Techno simply nodded.

"You don't look too excited- which is totally fine! mate, I hated school" The blonde commented with a soft laugh as he walked over to stand next to Techno, who inched away slightly.

"It’s…” Technos voice surprised even himself, it sounded...shaky, unsure “it’s fine”  
  
Phil crouched next to the brunette, his robe bunching at the ends and his bucket hat tipped ever so slightly at the motion, a soft smile gracing his face as he looked at Techno. He looked nothing but calm, proud in a sense, but ultimately calm. A look that Techno had never seen before he met the man, a look that instantly tried to relax his stress- cool his nerves and make him feel so, so safe. God, it’d be okay if he slipped once- right? This is to test the waters, see how well Phil can hide behind his "nice guy" facade- right? right, of course.  
  
“...mhn"  
  
“hm? “ the blonde cocked his head to the side, eyes gently sweeping over Technos features as the boy had turned to look at him- eyes narrowed and cautionary, and dare Phil to say, almost glassy, _almost_.  
  
“You-” the brunette fumbled with his fingers as he glanced around “you, uhm, are...okay”  
  
Cursing himself inwardly for the, to be put simply, idiotically formed sentence, Techno put a finger to Phil's shoulder and nodded gently  
  
“you- Good.” he attempted to confirm before retreating his hand and looking away “sorry”  
  
“Don’t-” Phil's mouth split into probably the biggest smile has seen yet “don’t be sorry! God, Techno, never be sorry- i- thank you. You’re also good, you’re very very good” _and i love you, son_

 _  
_A soundless nod came from the young boy as he looked back to the mirror with a small frown  
  
“Hair’s messy” was all he said but it was enough to make Phil's mind jump with an idea  
  
“Would you mind if I brushed it, then?”  
  
Big red eyes turned to Phil as if he had said the stupidest idea to ever grace the planet, almost offended but mostly perplexed. Brushing Technoblade, _The_ Technoblades hair? That thought had hit Technos head harder than any punch or kick he had ever received. Would it hurt? Would it put him at risk- of course, it would! He already slipped once today, that was enough. He had to go to school, he had to face everything that hell-trapped-in-a-building had to offer he could not, will not, accept this-  
  
“Yes” Technos voice, for the second time today, shocked him. It was small, like a child's- an _actual_ child's- as he looked at Phil “i- I mean- yes, you...can...sorry”  
  
 _God, you look like an idiot_ _  
_ _  
_ _Awww he’s scared!_ _  
_ _  
_Phil smiled as he reached over to the small shelf by the mirror, grabbing a brush and motioning Techno to come closer to him- which he obliged to, standing in front of the man as he tapped his foot lightly. This was a bad idea, why was he doing this, he was going to get hurt, this wouldn’t be worth it, he’ll get uncomfortable, Phil will lash out, he isn’t sa-  
  
All coherent thoughts stopped as felt a hand gently comb through his hair, followed by the soft feeling of a brush untangling the knots that had developed over weeks, and weeks, and weeks of neglect.  
  
It didn’t hurt.  
  
No, no it didn’t hurt at all- Phil was gentle, apologized anytime he thought he had tugged even a little too much, his fingers combing through Technos hair easily- even stopping a couple of times to gently scratch the top of his head or pet down his hair while it acted up. While Techno would dream to deny it, he leaned into the touch each time. It was...so comforting, he’d had his hair brushed before by previous families but usually, they were rough, yanking at his hair- even threatening to cut it off. He always felt unsafe, they could yank his hair and pull him around like a ragdoll laughing. But Phil? sure, it hurt every no and then, he had weeks of knots tangled in his hair so it was inevitable, but the reason Techno didn't mind was that he apologized, he was careful, and he took notice of things. He'd really never felt something quite like it, the soft pats nor the apologies nor the smiles- anything like this. It really just felt... _good_.  
  
It left...safe.  
  
The feeling was temporary, though.  
  
Walking into the classroom, Techno had been faced with standing in front of the _whole_ class, all 21 of them, and had to introduce himself. Had to speak, had to say who he was and where he was from and something about him- he was lost, truly, on what to say. Instead, he had mumbled his name and sent a desperate glance at the teacher, who still pushed him to say something more.  
  
“ ‘m Technoblade…” He wasn’t sure how far his voice had gotten “I like...reading”  
  
“We have a reader!” His teacher had cheered, patting his shoulder which caused him to flinch away, his teacher failed to notice “well then! You can sit by the bookshelves over there, Technoblade!”  
  
Quickly making his way over to the free desk by the bookshelves in the top left corner of the room, he could feel eyes poking at him. His...classmates, now, staring. He heard a few giggles, he saw a few flinches but, oh, he just wants to go back to this morning with Phil. He doesn’t want to be here anymore, he never did- but he had to.  
  
  
By the time snack rocked around, Techno could barely stand all the commotion. Children his age scattered out of the classrooms and down the halls, he was the last one out- hoping to catch a _minute_ of silence yet of course;  
  
“New kid!”  
  
Oh goddamnit  
  
Techno turned to see a boy, around his age- tall, blonde, a few freckles adorning his cheeks and the bridge of his nose. What really stuck out was the horrendous lime green hoodie that he’d thrown over himself, and the odd black mask he wore with a smiley face- maybe he was like those tourists who don’t like getting sick? But he sounded American…  
  
Techno just stared at him, he could probably beat him in a fight. This kid also looked like he got into fights, a couple of band-aids on his cheeks as well as some gauze wrapped around his knuckles and wrists.  
  
“Not much of a talker?” The boy must’ve grinned seeing as his eyes crinkled slightly at the sides “that's fine, I’m Dream. I’m from the other year 5 class”  
  
 _Dream is a fake name, he’s gonna try fight you_ _  
_ _  
_ _This guy is so annoying_ _  
_ _  
_ _Tackle him! Tackle him!_ _  
_ _  
_“Technoblade.”  
  
“Huh, and I thought I’d be the only one with a cool name”  
  
“Well excuse you” another boy had rounded the corner and shoved Dream lightly. This one was slightly shorter with silky black hair, a white bandana- he had a bit of a thicker accent, but not by much. “My name is just as cool, if not cooler”  
  
“No offence Sapitus Napitus” another boy appeared, _this_ one had a thick accent. British, similar to Phils yet stronger. He was the shortest of the group with brown hair and a weird pair of goggles on his head “actually, no, _full_ offence; your name sucks”  
  
“Gogy you’re so mean to me” the one Techno had come to conclude was called Sapitus Napitus, which was a stupid name, whined. Throwing his arms over the British boy “I’m crying, sobbing even- tears are falling down my face and it’s all your fault”  
  
“Ew get off me”  
  
“Okay ladies break it up” Dream finally spoke up with a laugh, Techno was already walking away. He only had 10 or so minutes of snack left, he was not going to hang around these imbeciles for much longer.  
  
“Techno!”  
  
He kept walking, he wasn’t gonna deal with this guy.  
  
“Techno! Techno!”  
  
Rounding a corner, Techno quickly hid in between one of the locker carts and held his breath. Dream wandered past with his idiots trailing close behind, Gogy and Sapitus Napitus absolutely clueless with where the brunette could have gone  
  
“He vanished!” the black-haired one spoke, sounding oddly gleeful, Techno could barely see him from behind the cart “dude, that’s so cool- maybe we’ll see him later?”  
  
“I don’t feel like looking for him, Dream- let’s just go, I’m hungry.”  
  
“You guys go ahead,” Dreams voice this time, he was closer the Techno than the others “I’ll meet you there”  
  
As the two wandered off to presumably the cafeteria, and just as Techno thought he was safe he was faced with shining green eyes looking through the space he climbed through  
  
“You’re good,” Dream said, backing away and gesturing to Techno to follow. He obliged, breathing out- how did this kid find him? “Almost didn’t notice you were there”  
  
“How-”  
  
“Not important” Dream quickly dismissed, waving a hand in front of his mask “anyway, don’t run off like that. You’re in the wrong hallway, the cafeteria is that way” he gestured down the hall the other boys went  
  
“I gotta catch up with George and Sapnap, but I’ll see you around, Techno”  
  
And just like that,  
Dream disappeared down the empty hall- silently, Techno noticed. The boy walked silently, not a single sound emitting from him.  
  
 _Ding ding ding_ _  
_ _  
_“Welcome home, Techno! How was your day?”  
  
Phil had poked his head from around the corner of the lounge room, the smell of stirfry filling the house. Techno looked away, taking his shoes off and letting out a soft grunt  
  
The blonde took notice of this, making his way into the hallway and cocking his head to the side. Techno stood in front of him, gripping the straps of his backpack- he wants to go to his room and just hug his stupid pig plushie on his beanbag. When did they become ‘his’?  
  
“Did-” Phil stopped, seeming to reconsider what he was about to ask-obviously deciding to as he lightly shook his head, he still looked worried “I made dinner, it’ll be ready soon. You liked the stirfry from the other night, so I made it again. Do ya wanna come into the kitchen or go to your room?”  
  
Techno wanted to go to his room, really, he wanted to sit there alone for a while.  
  
“Room”  
  
“Alright,” And there it is again, that fucking smile. He moved out of Technos way with a soft wave “I’ll call you when dinners ready”  
  
-  
Techno didn’t come out of his room that night.  
  
Phil came up at some point and knocked at the door with his dinner, setting it in front of the door when Techno refused to come out. Honestly, Phil was a little bit hurt. Technos has been with Phil for roughly a month now, and there has been improvement! Sure, there were a few stuff ups, but Phil thought he was doing a pretty good job- hell, Techno let Phil brush his hair today. Was it just school? Did something happen to set Techno off? It didn’t sit right with the blonde.  
  
It was around 11 pm now, dark clouds dripping tears of rain whispering outside as he sat at the bar counter in the kitchen, watching as the rain drizzled down the windows. He had the lights off, only a few candles lit with a calming vanilla scent, he liked to light them when he was stressed or tired, it always helped him calm down and rationalize situations. He must be overreacting but Phil knew Techno had issues with social situations, it was all over his report- should he have picked a different school, or gone with him to school? No, Techno made it clear he didn’t want Phil to take him to or from school saying he wanted some time to himself. Which was fine, 100% alright!  
  
“Oh boy…”  
  
Phil sighed, messy blonde hair falling over his eyes as he sipped at his tea. Homemade ginger tea, he grew some in the front yard and learnt how to make it himself years ago- another thing that helped him out. Techno would come around again, right? Yeah, of course he will...Phils just overreacting  
  
“...’il?”  
  
Instantly feeling more awake, Phil turned to see Techno standing at the doorway. He looked so tired, so, so very tired. Hair messy once again and he was still in the clothes he wore to school- they were now crinkled and messy. He looked slightly fearful but the look quickly subsided into one of confusion  
  
“Techno? Bud, it’s late- what are you doing up? Are you alright?” Phil said softly, concern lacing his words thickly  
  
No response, only a shaky nod and pointed finger to the chair beside him. Phil looked over before realizing what he was asking  
  
“Oh- of course!”  
  
Techno soundlessly made his way over to the chair and sat beside Phil, crossing his arms over the counter and resting his head on them. Phil noticed the brunettes uneven breathing, shaky at times, but instead chose to look out the window and drink his tea- getting the feeling that the younger wasn’t ready to talk just yet.  
  
They sat there for a while, in silence. The only sounds being of the rain outside and the soft sips from Phil. Eventually, though, Techno spoke  
  
“...school”  
  
“School?”  
  
“Tired” was all he got, words slurred “hard to…” Techno was facing him, tired red eyes scanning over Phil's cup as he scrunched his nose, trying to form what he wanted to say “to... speak”  
  
“You’re tired...so it’s hard to speak?”Phil asked, cocking his head to the side. Techno just nodded and flinched back- what was he just expecting Phil to do?  
  
 _Hit him, probably. You know his past._  
  
“That's alright,” Phil said with a gentle smile, his words honeyed and comforting “what if we do something so you don’t have to speak? Like…”  
  
Phil tapped his chin as he thought before knocking onto the counter, causing Techno to raise an eyebrow  
  
One knock.  
“ ‘I need time alone’ ”

Phil spoke, looking to Techno to make sure he was paying attention- which he was, surprisingly, watching Phil intently

  
Two knocks  
“ ‘I need silence’ ”  
  
Three knocks  
“ ‘i want to stay here’ ”  
  
A pause, Techno was now looking at Phil's eyes, and then, Phil made four knocks  
“ ‘i love you’ ”  
  
And the brunette looked away.  
  
Phils was about to take back the idea but was stopped by three knocks and Techno nervously glancing towards him. Phils smiled, he wished he could hug Techno right now and tell him everything would be okay. He wished Techno didn’t have to go through what he had to go through. He wishes he could know what happened from Technos point of view and _help._  
  
But he can’t.  
  
Not yet, at least.  
  
So he settled on four knocks.


	5. tension

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dreams an annoying lil shit and Techno cries plus Dadza pog

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i really don't like this chapter, had a bit of writers block but we;ll see how it goes. anyways- enjoy!
> 
> also- thank you for all the views and LOVELY COMMENTS!!!! you're all so sweet and I try to respond to each one <33
> 
> //TW//  
> \- panic attack but written poorly bc brain did not want to co-operate

**  
** It’s been tense, to say the least.  
  
After that late-night talk, Techno spoke less. After starting school, Techno spoke less.  
  
In fact, he barely spoke at all.  
  
They used the knocking system often, for most of the first month of school really. The brunette only spoke when he needed something to say, something usually important- “I needa be alone” or “go away”, if they were classified to be important. It hurt Phil, yes, feeling as though he was closed off from the young boy once again. It’s been two and a half months now, and the most progress he’s made was being allowed to ruffle Technos hair every once in a while. Aside from that? There was nothing.  
  
Not a single thing happening.  
  
Until yesterday, that is.  
  
It was late again, maybe around one in the morning this time, cold winter air nipped through the windows as the heater tried to keep it out. Phil had been downstairs since he got the call from Technos school that the boy had dashed out around lunchtime, and has yet to return. The blonde was worried sick, staying up to wait for him to come home- there wasn’t a search out for him yet seeing as the police in the area were awful and Phil could barely sit still as he made himself some ginger tea, something to calm his nerves. He was scared for Techno, he knew the boy didn’t like social situations- he should have helped, let him stay home, done _something_! The pitch black of his house seemed to only put him more on edge, which was strange. It felt like there was something, or maybe someone, also here with him.  
  
He slipped into the kitchen softly, making close to no sound as he wandered in- it looked empty. Puffing out a sigh of relief he felt a brief moment of relaxation- and, honestly, a bit of regret- he was silently wishing it was Techno. He was alone, Phil decided before he was slammed to the ground, his right arm being twisted behind his back with his face pushing onto the wooden floorboards.  
  
So many questions clouded his rational thinking, Phil quickly loosened his arm that was held, swirling out from the grasp of the intruder- they felt smaller than he thought as he moved to use his other arm that had not been, possibly, fractured and rammed them into the wall. Phil looked as though he lacked muscle but in reality, he was very fit and quite strong. The person struggled and only then did Phil realized who he was fighting-  
  
_Techno_ .  
  
At the realization, Phil instantly let go and moved back- only to be tackled again. God, this kid was strong. He had once more pushed Phil to the ground but this time Phil only held Technos arms away from him, trying to make eye contact- he had to get him to see what was happening, there was no way this was purposeful- right?  
  


* * *

  
  
Dream hadn’t left Techno alone and, quite frankly, it was getting on the boys' nerves.  
  
Every _single_ day he’d run up to Techno, pestering him until his friends (whos name’s he had learnt to actually be Sapnap and George) showed up and started pestering him as well- he just couldn’t catch a break. His main teacher, Mr Micheal, was really pushy. Constantly making him speak up in class, join group activities, share his things- he hated it. He really did. He hadn’t gotten into a fight yet, which was a miracle of sorts, but the voices were louder lately- as expected.  
  
But he could handle it.  
Or, at least, he thought he could.  
  
Right now, Techno was curled up in the corner of the office at the front of the school- stance defensive as he glared at the teachers trying to approach him. He had enough, they kept touching his shoulder, patting his back- everyone was too loud and no one would leave him alone. He wanted to go _home._  
  
“Technoblade this is extremely inappropriate!”  
  
A teacher whose voice he couldn’t recognize called from in front of him. His vision was blurred whenever something came close which caused him to jump into a defensive stance, guarding himself against whoever was in front of him-  
  
They would not get close to him.  
Not on his watch.  
So he ran.  
  
As fast as his legs could carry him he bolted, yellings came from behind him as he skilfully jumped over the school fencing and ran to-  
Well, the only place he knew he’d be safe.  
  
Phil.  
  
  
It took 10 minutes to run back to the house, he wasn’t being followed anymore, he was going to be safe. He just had to get to the door and-  
  
_What will Phil say about you skipping school?_ _  
_ _  
_ _He’ll probably get real mad, huh?  
_ _  
_ _But he said he hated school! So maybe you’ll be okay?_ _  
_ _  
_ _Better not take the chance, I reckon._  
  
This caused Techno to halt, looking around. He was at Phil's street, three more houses down and he’d be 'home' but did he really want to risk it?  
  
No.  
  
Turning on his heel, Techno ran off in the direction of the park nearby. He saw this place a couple of times on his way to school- he’d just stay there for a while, just until school ended and then go to the house as if nothing happened. Well, that was the plan. Techno reached the park soon, sitting on one of the swings and realizing he was gonna be here for a while, with nothing to do. Sighing, the brunette just swung absentmindedly and listened to the voices whispering into his ears- they seem to have grown a soft liking to the man, but were still cautious of him. Some calling Techno weak for also growing to like the elder while others praising the chance of rest, the boy scoffed. Rest? never heard of it, he thought stubbornly as he watched some kids wander past. He had hung around for one, two, three, four, five hours and what time did school end again? it was getting dark, What time was it?  
  
Hopping off the swingset caused his temporarily calmed panic to rise again- it was late.  
too late.  
  
Phils going to get mad at him, he thought as he walked out from the park and back to Phils house. It was much too late, people stopping walking a while ago but Techno could barely feel his feet touch the ground as he walked. His hands were shaking and his breathing was picking up and oh no not again...  
  


* * *

  
  
“Techno” A voice called as he struggled to throw another punch at the person under him, they were holding his arms away- they were strong. Who was he attacking again?  
  
“Techno, mate” The voice called again and he could barely keep his attack focused as voices called louder in his mind, commanding him for blood “hey, hey- it’s me.”  
  
The voice was starting to become recognizable. Slipping its way through the haze of his mind  
  
“It’s Phil.” The voice identified itself “You’re alright, mate”  
  
Phil…?  
  
Techno struggled to get back up, off of Phil- who easily let go of his arms. The boy scurried away and started blinking rapidly, desperate to clear his vision- rubbing harshly at his eyes. He felt someone- _Phil_ , come closer, kneeling in front of him.  
  
“Techno” his voice called, a gentle hand coming up to Technos cheek who flinched back until he saw it was Phil who had touched him. Fat tears forming in his eyes as Phil slowly rubbed a thumb over his cheek, almost controlling the tears to finally fall. "You're alright, what's wrong?" the man cooed, Technos shoulders shaking as he realized how stupid his thoughts from earlier were.   
  
Phil won't hurt him.  
  
“...ph-il” the boy hiccuped, reaching his arms up to grip at Phil's “it’s scary, Phil”  
  
Phil's heart shattered as he tentatively pulled the boy closer, who out exhausted, crumbled onto him. Resting his head on Phils shoulder, tears soaking into Phils pajamas as the man gently wove his fingers through the messy brunette locks as Techno whimpered against him,  
  
He was just a kid.  
  
and Phil was going to protect him.  
_  
_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> follow me on twitter @kokoyoshii for me crying about how I get writers block :[[[[


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